Monday, December 31, 2012

Resolutions




I got to thinking this morning about the things I want to accomplish next year. Days like this were made for promises. When I was drinking the last/first day of the month was the perfect day to swear to myself that today is the day that I quit drinking. A fresh start. A month unsoiled by hangovers and blackouts. I was saved!

Until.

Quitting drinking was always my New Year's resolution. I cannot remember a year that I didn't make an agreement with myself that this was my year: THE YEAR I GOT SOBER. And then I would get hammered on New Year's Eve and blam. All bets were off. I was suspicious that because I started the year hungover I would have to spend the whole year hungover. That was why I couldn't stop. I'd dealt my hand that one night. Forces at work beyond my control. I'd have to wait until next year. Booze logic y'all.

Two reasons I finally quit the day I did: a-) I was so hungover I could not get out of bed until almost 1:00 in the afternoon and b-) December 7th is the day my oldest son was due. This felt like an opportunity to find myself; a whole brand new fresh start. Tired old sick old used up me. Born.

Resolution is defined in so many cool ways that relate to sobriety. Complex to simple. Act of answering: solving. The act of determining. From dissonance to consonance. The settling of a pathological state. Expression of intent. The point in a literary work where the main dramatic complication is worked out. The ability to make recognizable the individual parts of an object. A measure of the sharpness of an image.

I think resolution might actually mean sober. 

So now, along with the thousandty things sobriety has brought me already I can add fresh New Year's resolutions. Here they are:

Run another marathon in October
Write thank you cards
Control spending
Chip away at debt
Have a real, week long family vacation
Monthly house organizing project

And...my newest and best one: STAY SOBER.

I'm certain I would love to hear yours too. I can pretty much guarantee it. :)






4 comments:

  1. Hi Amy, I'm happy to have found your blog via ByeByeBeer! I'm going to add you to my reader and catch up on your posts over the next few days.

    I'm thrilled that you have made the healthy decision to get sober! And I love that you are a fellow runner. Running has been so helpful to me in getting and staying sober. I ran my first marathon in November!

    I look forward to getting to know you. Best wishes and happy new year,

    Christy

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  2. Hi Christy! I'm happy to be found! I look forward to hearing your thoughts.

    Sobriety has changed my life so much in only 26 days. Running is one reason I wanted to quit- running with a hangover is terrible. I ran my first marathon in November 2 years ago. (And picked up what I call "drinking smoking" towards the end of my training. What a dummy.) Just like sobriety has made a huge shift in my life, running that marathon changed me forever. Congrats on your first! Will you have another?

    I look forward to getting to know you too. I noticed your music on your blog and wondered if you've ever heard of podrunner?

    Happy New Year!


    Amy

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    Replies
    1. Hi Amy,
      Oh I'll definitely have another, probably later this year. I'll do a two or three halves this first half of the year, then shift into marathon training again for a fall marathon. I know that shift that comes from finishing a marathon--it's wonderful isn't it?! You feel like you can take on the world! I wrote about the training and the after-glow on my blog, so dig around if you like. This is the one I posted right after my race:
      http://runningonsober.com/2012/11/05/she-didnt-know-she-could-jump-that-high/

      Podrunner-yes! DJ Steve Boyett rocks. I tend to hang out around the 155-165 bpm range. He has a lot of great mixes, and you can't beat the price! Sometimes I like more lyric driven songs, and jog.fm has been a great site to find some new running songs by bpm. Rock My Run is a great site too for running music. I think I have both of those websites on my "running blogroll" (under my recovery blogroll). I love talking music anytime, so don't be a stranger :)

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    2. "Johnny's Camaro" is one of our favorite songs around here! :)

      Best part of finishing my marathon? Hands down seeing my dad crying with pride as I smiled my way across the finish line. Things like that change you forever. :)

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